i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
