I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
