I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Is Oprah even human
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
