Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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