So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Floor bacon is actually really good
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize