OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
He had one of those small greek statue penises
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize