i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Randomize
