zippers are such a cool invention
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
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