biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Randomize
