I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Randomize