What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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