your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
