You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Randomize
