someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
