Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
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