Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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