He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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