I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Randomize
