just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
Drunk is not a location!
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
