you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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