My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Randomize
