fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Randomize