Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
we're so committed to being not committed
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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