i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
