Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize