i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
