One girl and one boy is just not enough.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
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