Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Randomize
