Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
