Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Found the puke drawer
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I have already put on my inside pants.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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