I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
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