so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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