I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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