u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
