sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
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