remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
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