I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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