he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
