in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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