did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
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