I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize