he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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