i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
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