their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
Randomize
