i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
this just has baby written all over it
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Randomize
