playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
