You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Randomize
