i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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