fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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