I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
