He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
