You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
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