Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize
