I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
